Ah, yes. Art and parenting. Both are such a learning process. The good news is, as with all skills, we get better at them with practice.
I love the First-Year Ballerina painting! Does your daughter approve? It must feel good to know when a painting is finished and let out a sigh of accomplishment. Well done, my friend. As for the watercolor, as you mentioned, you learned a lot about technique so yes, a win for sure. You're too hard on yourself, but what artist isn't?
And your volunteer stories gave me a chuckle. As a former elementary school teacher I totally relate. It's an exhausting job. Even on good days! Kudos to you for being a willing volunteer!
I thoroughly enjoyed this one, Beth, as I do all your posts. Thank you for sharing your words, wisdom, and paintings with us.
Beth, one of the things I took from this essay is that learning isn't always about mastering something the first time around. Sometimes it's about returning to it years later with more patience, perspective, and kindness toward ourselves. I admit it's not something I'm very good at, but I am trying to learn to have more patience and self-compassion. Reading stories like yours helps x
Thank you so much, Marie, for your comment. I believe that learning something takes time, and we have to be patient with ourselves. I hadn't been spending much time with watercolors, so I don't know why I expected it to go better. I will be doing watercolors for awhile -- and viewing more tutorials, too.
"Unfortunately, my version is not very good:" Our self-talk is often so negative. But I didn't see what you found fault with until you mentioned it.
When I go to galleries and observe paintings, I see what I see. Which might be very different from what the person next to me sees. Or what you had intended. Same thing with my writing. Some people think it's eloquent; others are deeply offended by it. Remember, "beauty is in the eyes of..." And I so admire you for tackling watercolor, in my opinion a difficult medium.
You have a great gift, Beth, not the least of which is your level of self-reflection. xoxo
You are right about the negative self-talk. So many of us (me included) think negatively about our creative abilities. I do believe I do need to practice watercolors more; after all, I haven't put in the work in improving my watercolor skills. And, yes, it's such an unforgiving medium, for sure. I am so looking forward to working with watercolors for the next few weeks.
And I agree with you that art (including writing, for writing is also an art) is certainly in the eye of the beholder. We all have our own tastes, and that's the way it should be.
I also love your insightful comments each week. Thank you so much for your wonderful takes on things. And I am one of the people who finds your writing eloquent!
I love how you kept working at the ballerina painting, and I love the painting. I hope your daughter does too. Your volunteer stories are too funny, although I know you didn't think so at the time. It's so nice you were able to involve yourself with your daughter's school activities. So many parents don't either have the time or have a desire to. Good for you although things didn't quite go as planned.
Thank you for your high compliment on the painting, as well as the intense process of making it come to life. My daughter was unhappy that the ballerina's face didn't look like hers, making the artwork unrealistic in her eyes. The original reference photo was so blurry, it was so difficult to see her face clearly, but I loved her pose, which is why I chose to paint this one.
As you know, my daughter is an artist, too, but she and I have conflict at times about what constitutes art. She's very photorealistic, and I'm not, so disagreements ensue. Yikes!
As far as volunteering in my daughter's classes when she was young, I am so glad I did it, though each experience was super difficult -- and frustrating. Looking back, they are quite funny, though at the time I was frustrated. Still, I have no regrets!
First of all, I love the way First Year Ballerina turned out. It's beautiful tribute to your daughter. And I love the symbolism that the mirror provides -- art reflects back to us our most essential selves.
At the time I'm sure it was stressful, but hearing the stories now, made me grin -- oh the best laid plans . . . Teachers are way underpaid for what they do, in my estimation.
May your art continue to reflect back to you the beauty and kindness in your being. I so love your art and your Substack stories.
(PS- I'm in CA looking for new homes this week, so I haven't been on Substack hardly at all.)
Biggest of hugs from your friend and your forever fan, ~S
I so appreciate that you took the time out of your busy schedule to read and comment on my post. It means so much to me. It sounds like you are California-bound, so exciting.
I'm also happy with First-Year Ballerina. To be honest, the face doesn't look like my daughter's because the original reference photo was a super blurry one. (I think I'm done working from blurry photos!) I had to essentially make the face up, so I'm good with knowing that this painting captures the idea of my daughter, rather than an accurate depiction of her. Despite the blurry photo, I loved, loved, loved her pose, which is why I decided to paint this one.
You are so insightful. I didn't even think of the symbolism of the mirror, but you are right: art does provide a reflection of ourselves.
And I agree that teachers are so underpaid. It is such a challenging job, and they are educating our future leaders.
Sending you loving wishes that you find a home you love. Hugs, Beth
Well, Beth after many of my own school ‘field trips’ with my children, I totally understand. And here’s a belated hug for good measure! I hope you went home and treated yourself to a soothing drink, snack and some quiet time. I always felt being there for my kids was the most important thing, to support them, see the kids in the class and who they ‘hung out’ with as well as helping out the teacher(and seeing what kind of teacher they had that year).
Congratulations on finishing your ballerina painting! And your patience with all the changes and new explorations. I love seeing how your work evolves. Most important is how it felt for you to experiment with new ideas and textures.
Thank you for the hug! You are so right about being there for your kids. Like you, I was able, through my classroom visits, to discern what kind of students were in the class, whom my daughter got along with, how the teacher worked, etc.
Despite the unexpected snafus, looking back, I am so glad I showed up and volunteered, even if things went off kilter. Volunteering with the kids was such hard work. I admire teachers for their perseverance and ability to teach even the unruliest of kids.
Thank you for the congratulations. I will be working on watercolors for awhile, so that I can better learn how to work in this medium. I think I need to step back, embrace that beginner's mindset, and go forward with watercolors. It's going to take time, but I'm patient. 💕
Showing up for our kids is so important--even if we're not perfect at it. Love hearing about your experiences, Beth.
Congrats for tackling watercolor landscapes. Waterolors are some of my favorite of my mom's paintings, but she used to get so frustrated with their unforgiving nature, she gave up on them.
As with the field trips, I think it's less about the mastery than the challenge. You're brave for taking them on!
Thank you, Robin, for your supportive comment. You are so right: it is essential that we show up for our kids. I know my daughter was thrilled I was in her classroom, even if my experiences were less than stellar. I wanted to be a part of her life in every way I could.
I'm sure your talented mom's watercolors are beautiful. She was such a great artist. I, too, am frustrated with the unforgiving nature of watercolors. I will continue to watch techniques on tutorials and mimic what I see, just to help me improve.
Beth how wonderful that revisiting the first year ballerina brought back those memories - and the dedication and kindness you showed to make sure you were involved in your daughter's school life. You're certainly a braver woman than me to volunteer at the school!
I also really admire you for persisting with the painting, to keep working the ballerina until you achieve how you want it to look, but also I love that you quite freely show a painting where you're not happy with the results. So many people would cringe at doing that because of ego, but you just accept you had a go, you're not happy with it but see all the positives of enjoying the experience of experimenting and learning new techniques. That's all we need whatever our art - just to turn the music up, give something a go, learn from it and, most of all, enjoy the process! 😊
Lin, I love your comment, and perhaps I was brave to volunteer at school-related activities. Or perhaps I was silly because each experience was not pleasant, and yet I kept volunteering. Oh my gosh!
Thank you so much for your generous words about my showcasing my paintings -- whether or not I'm happy with the end results. I used to not share the work I didn't like, but at this point, I feel that sharing both aspects -- my success and lack of success -- is necessary to give a more complete picture of my process.
I realized that because oil painting is in my comfort zone, I'm spending a lot of time with this medium instead of spending some time on watercolor, so of course, I'm still quite rough around the edges with this medium. I think I'll be focusing on watercolors for awhile. I've got a bunch of tutorials to watch!
Dear Beth, I love the way your art and parenting stories sit side by side like two chapters of the very same lesson. What really caught my eye was how each vignette, whether it happened in classroom or studio ... carried this same quiet truth, we all learn by staying with what doesn’t go to plan.
For that (long-lasting!) sneeze, those untied bracelets and helping out on that local trip, were all moments where you showed up with care and intention, only to be met with wild unpredictability. And then with your painting many years later … you return to something that once overwhelmed you only to discover you could actually meet it with patience, detail and trust.
It’s the same muscle, I intuit, just a different medium.
As always, there’s such tenderness in the way you tell your stories and with such resilience too. Thank you so much for sharing them … they remind me that "the art of self care" isn’t always soft blankets and candles ... sometimes it’s simply allowing ourselves to become complete beginners again and again and yep, again! Love and gentle hope. 🙏💖🫂
Oh thank you for such an insightful comment! I never realized it, but you're right: there are parallels between the vignettes and my revisiting the painting I started years ago. Both experiences -- class helper and artist -- taught me that things aren't always predictable. In fact, sometimes we have to cope with the unpredictability in life.
I so appreciate your analysis of my experiences in the classroom and in the studio. They are so parallel, and your insight helped shed light on these experiences.
And I agree with your interpretation of "the art of self care." Perennially becoming beginners is really one solid way to achieve growth.
Oh Beth, you have to be so brave to be a volunteer for school children. I applaud you for making the heroic effort here to show up and offer your kind support, but with kids, especially these days, expect the unexpected. Still, you show a tenacity and resilience that is laudable. And it reveals itself through your persistence with your lovely art. I love how the ballerina has sprung into life, it’s filled with delicious color and movement. I’m glad you’re spending your time sharing these great lessons with us and your artist process and results. Don’t ever stop!
Doing class-related activities with children sounded wonderful to me -- in theory. Oh my goodness; it was sooooo difficult to deal with all sorts of personalities and snafus!
I showed up for my daughter, and she loved my being there (although nowadays as a teenager, she doesn't relish the idea of me being there with her and her friends, nor do I have any interest in hanging out with them!)
Thank you for your kind compliment on First-Year Ballerina. I really appreciate it and am happy with how this painting turned out. I did the best I could. I don't plan to stop sharing my artistic process, and of course, I always plan to continue painting!
Wow! I wouldn’t have made it through those volunteer experiences. My patience is so limited.
I love the finished painting! What a wonderful gift to yourself and to your daughter!
Hi Beth,
Ah, yes. Art and parenting. Both are such a learning process. The good news is, as with all skills, we get better at them with practice.
I love the First-Year Ballerina painting! Does your daughter approve? It must feel good to know when a painting is finished and let out a sigh of accomplishment. Well done, my friend. As for the watercolor, as you mentioned, you learned a lot about technique so yes, a win for sure. You're too hard on yourself, but what artist isn't?
And your volunteer stories gave me a chuckle. As a former elementary school teacher I totally relate. It's an exhausting job. Even on good days! Kudos to you for being a willing volunteer!
I thoroughly enjoyed this one, Beth, as I do all your posts. Thank you for sharing your words, wisdom, and paintings with us.
Beth, one of the things I took from this essay is that learning isn't always about mastering something the first time around. Sometimes it's about returning to it years later with more patience, perspective, and kindness toward ourselves. I admit it's not something I'm very good at, but I am trying to learn to have more patience and self-compassion. Reading stories like yours helps x
Thank you so much, Marie, for your comment. I believe that learning something takes time, and we have to be patient with ourselves. I hadn't been spending much time with watercolors, so I don't know why I expected it to go better. I will be doing watercolors for awhile -- and viewing more tutorials, too.
I so appreciate your insights. ❤
"Unfortunately, my version is not very good:" Our self-talk is often so negative. But I didn't see what you found fault with until you mentioned it.
When I go to galleries and observe paintings, I see what I see. Which might be very different from what the person next to me sees. Or what you had intended. Same thing with my writing. Some people think it's eloquent; others are deeply offended by it. Remember, "beauty is in the eyes of..." And I so admire you for tackling watercolor, in my opinion a difficult medium.
You have a great gift, Beth, not the least of which is your level of self-reflection. xoxo
Hi Marilea,
You are right about the negative self-talk. So many of us (me included) think negatively about our creative abilities. I do believe I do need to practice watercolors more; after all, I haven't put in the work in improving my watercolor skills. And, yes, it's such an unforgiving medium, for sure. I am so looking forward to working with watercolors for the next few weeks.
And I agree with you that art (including writing, for writing is also an art) is certainly in the eye of the beholder. We all have our own tastes, and that's the way it should be.
I also love your insightful comments each week. Thank you so much for your wonderful takes on things. And I am one of the people who finds your writing eloquent!
Thank you, dear Stephanie, for the restack. I so appreciate you!
I love how you kept working at the ballerina painting, and I love the painting. I hope your daughter does too. Your volunteer stories are too funny, although I know you didn't think so at the time. It's so nice you were able to involve yourself with your daughter's school activities. So many parents don't either have the time or have a desire to. Good for you although things didn't quite go as planned.
Hi Nancy,
Thank you for your high compliment on the painting, as well as the intense process of making it come to life. My daughter was unhappy that the ballerina's face didn't look like hers, making the artwork unrealistic in her eyes. The original reference photo was so blurry, it was so difficult to see her face clearly, but I loved her pose, which is why I chose to paint this one.
As you know, my daughter is an artist, too, but she and I have conflict at times about what constitutes art. She's very photorealistic, and I'm not, so disagreements ensue. Yikes!
As far as volunteering in my daughter's classes when she was young, I am so glad I did it, though each experience was super difficult -- and frustrating. Looking back, they are quite funny, though at the time I was frustrated. Still, I have no regrets!
First of all, I love the way First Year Ballerina turned out. It's beautiful tribute to your daughter. And I love the symbolism that the mirror provides -- art reflects back to us our most essential selves.
At the time I'm sure it was stressful, but hearing the stories now, made me grin -- oh the best laid plans . . . Teachers are way underpaid for what they do, in my estimation.
May your art continue to reflect back to you the beauty and kindness in your being. I so love your art and your Substack stories.
(PS- I'm in CA looking for new homes this week, so I haven't been on Substack hardly at all.)
Biggest of hugs from your friend and your forever fan, ~S
Hi dear Stephanie,
I so appreciate that you took the time out of your busy schedule to read and comment on my post. It means so much to me. It sounds like you are California-bound, so exciting.
I'm also happy with First-Year Ballerina. To be honest, the face doesn't look like my daughter's because the original reference photo was a super blurry one. (I think I'm done working from blurry photos!) I had to essentially make the face up, so I'm good with knowing that this painting captures the idea of my daughter, rather than an accurate depiction of her. Despite the blurry photo, I loved, loved, loved her pose, which is why I decided to paint this one.
You are so insightful. I didn't even think of the symbolism of the mirror, but you are right: art does provide a reflection of ourselves.
And I agree that teachers are so underpaid. It is such a challenging job, and they are educating our future leaders.
Sending you loving wishes that you find a home you love. Hugs, Beth
Well, Beth after many of my own school ‘field trips’ with my children, I totally understand. And here’s a belated hug for good measure! I hope you went home and treated yourself to a soothing drink, snack and some quiet time. I always felt being there for my kids was the most important thing, to support them, see the kids in the class and who they ‘hung out’ with as well as helping out the teacher(and seeing what kind of teacher they had that year).
Congratulations on finishing your ballerina painting! And your patience with all the changes and new explorations. I love seeing how your work evolves. Most important is how it felt for you to experiment with new ideas and textures.
Hi Susan,
Thank you for the hug! You are so right about being there for your kids. Like you, I was able, through my classroom visits, to discern what kind of students were in the class, whom my daughter got along with, how the teacher worked, etc.
Despite the unexpected snafus, looking back, I am so glad I showed up and volunteered, even if things went off kilter. Volunteering with the kids was such hard work. I admire teachers for their perseverance and ability to teach even the unruliest of kids.
Thank you for the congratulations. I will be working on watercolors for awhile, so that I can better learn how to work in this medium. I think I need to step back, embrace that beginner's mindset, and go forward with watercolors. It's going to take time, but I'm patient. 💕
Showing up for our kids is so important--even if we're not perfect at it. Love hearing about your experiences, Beth.
Congrats for tackling watercolor landscapes. Waterolors are some of my favorite of my mom's paintings, but she used to get so frustrated with their unforgiving nature, she gave up on them.
As with the field trips, I think it's less about the mastery than the challenge. You're brave for taking them on!
Thank you, Robin, for your supportive comment. You are so right: it is essential that we show up for our kids. I know my daughter was thrilled I was in her classroom, even if my experiences were less than stellar. I wanted to be a part of her life in every way I could.
I'm sure your talented mom's watercolors are beautiful. She was such a great artist. I, too, am frustrated with the unforgiving nature of watercolors. I will continue to watch techniques on tutorials and mimic what I see, just to help me improve.
Beth how wonderful that revisiting the first year ballerina brought back those memories - and the dedication and kindness you showed to make sure you were involved in your daughter's school life. You're certainly a braver woman than me to volunteer at the school!
I also really admire you for persisting with the painting, to keep working the ballerina until you achieve how you want it to look, but also I love that you quite freely show a painting where you're not happy with the results. So many people would cringe at doing that because of ego, but you just accept you had a go, you're not happy with it but see all the positives of enjoying the experience of experimenting and learning new techniques. That's all we need whatever our art - just to turn the music up, give something a go, learn from it and, most of all, enjoy the process! 😊
Lin, I love your comment, and perhaps I was brave to volunteer at school-related activities. Or perhaps I was silly because each experience was not pleasant, and yet I kept volunteering. Oh my gosh!
Thank you so much for your generous words about my showcasing my paintings -- whether or not I'm happy with the end results. I used to not share the work I didn't like, but at this point, I feel that sharing both aspects -- my success and lack of success -- is necessary to give a more complete picture of my process.
I realized that because oil painting is in my comfort zone, I'm spending a lot of time with this medium instead of spending some time on watercolor, so of course, I'm still quite rough around the edges with this medium. I think I'll be focusing on watercolors for awhile. I've got a bunch of tutorials to watch!
And, yes, it's all about the process.
Dear Beth, I love the way your art and parenting stories sit side by side like two chapters of the very same lesson. What really caught my eye was how each vignette, whether it happened in classroom or studio ... carried this same quiet truth, we all learn by staying with what doesn’t go to plan.
For that (long-lasting!) sneeze, those untied bracelets and helping out on that local trip, were all moments where you showed up with care and intention, only to be met with wild unpredictability. And then with your painting many years later … you return to something that once overwhelmed you only to discover you could actually meet it with patience, detail and trust.
It’s the same muscle, I intuit, just a different medium.
As always, there’s such tenderness in the way you tell your stories and with such resilience too. Thank you so much for sharing them … they remind me that "the art of self care" isn’t always soft blankets and candles ... sometimes it’s simply allowing ourselves to become complete beginners again and again and yep, again! Love and gentle hope. 🙏💖🫂
Hi Deborah,
Oh thank you for such an insightful comment! I never realized it, but you're right: there are parallels between the vignettes and my revisiting the painting I started years ago. Both experiences -- class helper and artist -- taught me that things aren't always predictable. In fact, sometimes we have to cope with the unpredictability in life.
I so appreciate your analysis of my experiences in the classroom and in the studio. They are so parallel, and your insight helped shed light on these experiences.
And I agree with your interpretation of "the art of self care." Perennially becoming beginners is really one solid way to achieve growth.
I’m so pleased I’ve helped you make a connection. I saw it this morning and thought, oh I must tell Beth! 🙏🥰
I so appreciate you, Deborah! ❤️
Oh Beth, you have to be so brave to be a volunteer for school children. I applaud you for making the heroic effort here to show up and offer your kind support, but with kids, especially these days, expect the unexpected. Still, you show a tenacity and resilience that is laudable. And it reveals itself through your persistence with your lovely art. I love how the ballerina has sprung into life, it’s filled with delicious color and movement. I’m glad you’re spending your time sharing these great lessons with us and your artist process and results. Don’t ever stop!
Hi Gerry,
Doing class-related activities with children sounded wonderful to me -- in theory. Oh my goodness; it was sooooo difficult to deal with all sorts of personalities and snafus!
I showed up for my daughter, and she loved my being there (although nowadays as a teenager, she doesn't relish the idea of me being there with her and her friends, nor do I have any interest in hanging out with them!)
Thank you for your kind compliment on First-Year Ballerina. I really appreciate it and am happy with how this painting turned out. I did the best I could. I don't plan to stop sharing my artistic process, and of course, I always plan to continue painting!